Guardians of the (Cinematic) Galaxy

If you are like me, you may have never heard of Guardians of the Galaxy prior to 2012. However, when Marvel announced that the team would star in their own movie this upcoming summer, that all changed. Sure, some of us may have known about Rocket Raccoon because of his absurdity, and his character starring in the  “Marvel Vs. Capcom” video game, but let’s be honest here, Guardians was not high on the “Cannot wait to see them” list.

But for Marvel, it was. And that got me thinking as to why? Nothing against Guardians, but they were a C-list squad at best, and yet they got a movie before Black Panther, Namor (although Namor is locked in the between-verse of Mutant/Avenger…) and even the re-imagined Hulk. Again, I asked why?

Then it hit me, there are plenty of reasons as to why Disney/Marvel made this movie  (Marvel) Now.

Firstly, they wanted to know if the Marvel cinematic universe can really hold its own sans RDJ. Think about it, this all started with Iron Man and its hint at a bigger universe. Marvel admits that they weren’t sure if it would work or even happen, but with the star power and brilliance of RDJ and the big hit of a movie, Marvel took the leap. It was during that time that the Disney upper-levels were in love with the “one star” model, where they banked on having one major star in a movie that relied solely on said star. Yes, I am talking about Johnny Depp. He was Disney’s glory man, starring in Pirates 1,2,3 and 4, along with Alice In Wonderland. Not to mention the creepy Charlie and the Chocolate Factory from 2005.  Well, Depp has fallen out of favor since the debacle that was the Lone Ranger, or was it Lone Racist, I’m not totally sure. You see my point, Disney has realized that one star cannot carry multiple franchises. Not to mention the fact that Robert Downey has expressed that he cannot do this forever, and Marvel needs to be ready for a world without Iron Man. This is their attempt at it, for there are no hints that Iron Man or any Avenger is going to show up in this film, except for a potential invite post-credits to the Avengers 2 party. That has never happened in this run of films, every movie had either Agent Coulson, Fury himself or a Stark man appear in the movie.

Next, They need to know if lower level characters can sell. Yes, Iron Man was a B-list guy who had cool gadgets and he sold well, but Guardians is another notch below that. As are guys like Black Panther, Doctor Strange  and Ant-Man, many of which remain unknown to the average person. At least Thor and Captain America had Norse tales and “Head of the Avengers” to sell to generic audiences. The Hulk had a classic ’80s TV show to boast about, unlike Doctor Strange’s attempt at the small screen (just google it). If Guardians works, and works standing alone, you can bet that Kevin Feige will stop saying Black Panther “is in the production stages” and start saying “arriving late 2015.”

Third, Marvel wants to know if they can go on the cheap. It has been noted by many that the salaries of those seen in the Avengers are very low, unless you have the last name Jackson or Downey. You can bet your bottom dollar that the actors in Guardians are on that lower level pay scale. Considering the credits list includes Chris Pratt (of Parks and Rec fame) and Vin Diesel, with the biggest name arguably being Bradley Cooper as the voice of Rocket Raccoon, Marvel is definitely cutting the budget. I do not mean to say that these actors are bad, or unqualified. I am just saying that Chris Pratt is not drawing fans to the seats, and Vin Diesel might if there were neon lights under a Mitsubishi Eclipse. But there is no Paul Walker in a Hummer here, and Marvel wants to be able to say to the big guys that they can sign a more affordable star for Black Panther and Captain Marvel.

If Guardians of the Galaxy flops, I worry that we could see projects like Captain Marvel, Black Panther, Doctor Strange and Nova shelved for quite some time in favor of Iron Man 5, Thor 3: Loki’s Turn and Fury. And that would be unfortunate, not because these sequels would necessarily be bad, but because it would become the never-ending loop of the same characters going through the motions A conservative approach is not what we need, because risk-taking is what gives us movies like Star Wars and complacency and laziness is what gives us Episode I. I do trust Disney/Marvel, and I’m sure it remembers how big of a chance it took with Iron Man, and we all know how that turned out.

Go Guardians, go.

The Future of (Marvel) Television

The fall television season is in full swing, with all of the major networks debuting big new shows. On Fox, you can find Sleepy Hollow, a show that puts Ichabod Crane in the 21st century. Honestly, it is a great show that boasts guest stars John Cho (Star Trek), and Clancy Brown (voice of Lex Luthor in Superman:TAS). We head over to NBC, which has James Spader, a.k.a. Ultron, as a wanted spy in The Black List.

Then there is ABC, which has the most anticipated show this fall, Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. This marks a new beginning in TV/movie crossover that we haven’t seen since the likes of The X Files: which was a show, then a movie, then a show again, then another movie.

The thing that makes this transition so weird is that it is backwards. Usually a show grows into a movie (withholding the Disney and Nickelodeon animated TV spinoffs…), not the other way around. Another odd element of all of this is the fact the series is revolving around a much beloved character that was created in the cinematic universe for the sole purpose of inexpensive Sam Jackson S.H.I.E.L.D. fill-in. This same character, whose actor is a long-time comic book junkie, had such a cult following and stage presence that he was written in as a big part of the Avengers (I mean IT WAS his death that they… avenged.) Oh yeah, he is also supposed to be dead.

If that isn’t enough for you to say, “Wow. How did THAT happen?” then I do not know what is.

You know what the beauty of it all is: this is only the beginning. If Marvel’s new show, henceforth called Shield, takes off and becomes a hit (and there is little reason to think it shouldn’t), you can expect more TV/cinema bundles.

The first one starring Daredevil.

There is precedent for a TV show featuring a prominent superhero. Smallville and Arrow are two that come to mind.  It’s an easy choice too, if one steps back and looks at Matt Murdock’s story. He is a lawyer by day, crime fighter by night, and he’s blind. He also has an arch nemesis in The Kingpin, who could be the overarching villain in the series. It would be Boston Legal/The Practice plus Law & Order plus a superhero show all in one. Matt Murdock is an extremely complicated character who could thrive with the slow burn of television. I guarantee it would not be hard to engross people in his tragic tale.

As for the past, ABC once tried to have a blind detective series, aptly titled Blind Justice, but it flopped. Probably because it was cheesy and no one at the studio cared to make it any good. And that is where Daredevil differs. He already has a great story, and people already know who he is. Those are the number one factors when deciding to start a series or movie franchise, because it makes it easier to sell. Add on to the fact that Marvel can take Daredevil and move him into its cinematic universe with RDJ at the snap of the fingers and you have a show with millions of adoring fans.

I can see it now, the pilot opens with flashes of Matt’s past, then BOOM! He wakes up, panting. As he strolls into his office, he is greeted by a man he has never met.

“Hello,” the man says.

“You work for the FBI?” Murdock replies without a missed step.

“What makes you say that?” replies the man.

“Well, the government-issued watch you have has a specific tick to it, and not many lawyers in my office walk around in $50 fake alligator loafers. We prefer the the $250 ones,” Matt replies quickly.

“Actually, I prefer them too. And I don’t work for the FBI Mr. Murdock. I work for S.H.I.E.L.D.” he says.

“Never heard of it.”

“It’s ok, not many have. We need you Matt, or should I call you Daredevil?”

“Who are you?”

“One of the good guys. But for now, you can call me Agent Coulson.”

Yup! A cross-over TV series where Coulson assists, once every 5-10 episodes, with Matt and his cases. Then, you have the Daredevil movie, followed, of course, by Avengers 3 and his entrance into the pantheon of heroes.

It would be revolutionary to see a major hero float in and out of TV and major motion picture, and I am sure the cost for an actor would be immense. However, Daredevil needs a do-over, and to me, this could be the best way to ease audiences back towards the Man Without Fear.

Pondering the Future of the Minnesota Vikings

Fact: As of this writing, the Minnesota Vikings have fewer wins than the Oakland Raiders.

Yikes.

Now, many have jumped ship (no pun intended) on the Vikes 2013-2014 season, so it seems appropriate to look ahead at what the team can do the rest of the season. The following are scenarios for the Vikings, given code names to protect the innocent.

1.  Code name “Christ Almighty”: Continue to play Christian Ponder

This option would infuriate majority of the Viking fan base to a foaming mouth full of purple and gold, but might be the smartest move. Yes, Ponder has struggled, but he has also showed flashes of competence. If the offensive line continues to play like the jay-vee squad from the Gophers, the Vikes will need a mobile quarterback to scramble for extra yards because Matt Cassel ain’t winning any foot races anytime soon. Another reason to continue to play Ponder is to get a full 100% clear picture on his ability to play quarterback.  In the last few years, Ponder has paired an inability to play with flashes of brilliance. Let him play through 2013-2014 and finally decide, prior to the 2014 draft, if he is “your guy.”

Worst case (or best case…): Ponder struggles to a 3-13 record, the Vikings have a top 5 pick and get their choice from a quarterback pool that could include game changers Brett Hundley, Marcus Mariota, Teddy Bridgewater and Aaron Murray to name a few.

Best case: For some, see above. Otherwise, The Vikings, and Ponder, turn it around and finish with a 10-6 record, and a shot at the playoffs knowing that Ponder can play the position. Ok, the worst case is definitely better…

2. Code name “Big Chief”: Switch to Matt Cassel

It is the perfect time for Leslie Frazier and company to make the move. Your team is out of the country, against another 0-3 team in the Steelers, and your season is in the balance. Also, you have a bye week after the trip to Harry Potter land, so you can adjust your offensive scheme over that period. Cassel is a guy who has shown he can throw the ball with a bit of zip, and however immobile he may be, he could be the game manager that the team desperately needs.

Worst case: Cassel comes in, looks like  Donovan McNabb did in purple and gold, Vikes continue to struggle and the team is left with two horrific QB’s. This, too, could lead to a fruitful addition at QB, but may also leave the Vikes still wondering if Ponder can sling the football. The chants of “one more year!” can be heard echoing from the Vikes front office throughout the off-season.

More Worst case: Vikes pull the plug on Ponder, Cassel gets the team to 5-6, breaks his collarbone, then Ponder HAS to come back in and helps get the Vikes limp to 7-9. No playoffs, and the Vikings miss out on Hundley and Mariota. Then, they forget that they’re on the clock in the first round and miss their pick. Ponder comes back to more “one more year!” chants from Rick Spielman.

3. Code name: “Brown Sale Fire Sale”:  Trade Jared Allen, Kevin Williams, Brian Robison or Everson Griffin

Seriously, all of these guys are free agents after this year, and Allen and Williams will most likely take their talents elsewhere. The Viqueens obviously need to keep either Robison or Griffin, but why not trade one or both? Cough cough, Jadeveon Clowney, cough. I hope Allen stays, because he does fit well in Minny and the fans love him as much as he loves them. Just ignore Allen’s one sack on the year…

Best Case: Minnesota trades any combo of the two, gets Clowney after he slips in the draft due to a positive marijuana test, and the crowd gets their “number 96 jerseys back out” because the Clown’s home. Clowney becomes the modern day Randy Moss for the Vikes, causing GM’s around the league to ask the same question they did in 1998, “How did we miss this guy?”

Worst Case: Minny holds on to all four, watches them all do the moon walk to other cities in the off-season and weeps openly when Jadeveon Clowney heads to Detroit to complete the most brutal defensive line to ever grace the field (Clowney, Suh, Fairly, Ansah). Ponder rejoices.

4. Code name “Hail Mary”: Start McCleod Bethel-Thompson

I seriously do not know if he is on the active roster or not, and I don’t care enough to check. All I can say is that the third string quarterback for the Browns did pretty well. Why not?

Best Case: You get to hear “Bethel-Thompson throws to the back of the endzone!” (Say that 5 times fast.)

Worst Case: Can’t think of one…

5. Code name “Spider-Man”: Start Joe Webb

Bring Webb in, throw in some zone read plays, and let him air it out 50 yards on 10 yard outs again.

Best Case: 0-16 and the quarterback of your choice.

Worst Case: Webb propels the Vikings to a 13-3 record and then, before yet another disappointing playoff loss, Christian Ponder comes in for an injured Webb and leads a miracle comeback. After leading the team to a Super Bowl title, the Vikings stick with Ponder. the Vikings extend Ponder through 2019 as the ensuing 2014 draft class produces 9 Hall of Fame quarterbacks. Ponder continues to struggle with ups and downs throughout his career and the Vikes never see the playoffs. Adrian Peterson cries All Day. Ponder rejoices.

 

That Football Team in DC

What’s in a name?

Recently, a debate surrounding the Washington Redskins’ name (a debate that spans 50 years) has been brought back into the spotlight. This started gaining steam in May when the franchise posted a statement saying that owner Daniel Snyder will never change the name, ever. Then, more recently, big-time columnists like Peter King (mmqb.com) and  Bill Simmons (Grantland.com) have issued, albeit unofficially, that they are vetoing the name by calling the team “Washington” or “Washington’s franchise.”

Now I will ask again, what’s in a name?

Because it doesn’t matter what Peter King calls the “Washington Franchise,” for it is in control of one man, Dan Snyder.

“We’ll never change the name,” Snyder said in the spring. “It’s that simple. NEVER — you can use caps.”

He continued on, “As a lifelong Redskins fan, and I think that the Redskins fans understand the great tradition and what it’s all about and what it means, so we feel pretty fortunate to be just working on next season.”

Then, last week, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell seemingly positioned himself squarely on the most middle post of the proverbial fence, saying in one breath, “I know the team name is part of their history, and that’s something that’s important to the Redskins fans.” He then following his previous statement with “but if one person is offended, we have to listen.”

Oh… If he would have stopped right there, the heat that would have been on Snyder might have made the Sahara look like an ice cream shoppe. However, Goodell bailed Snyder out, saying that the decision is “ultimately up to Dan [Snyder].”

And that’s the point. Goodell may be privately irate, but he is not stupid. He wouldn’t out an owner in public, no he is too wise to do that. Calling out Snyder through the media would only hurt the NFL’s brand, causing a bigger rift between fans and team. Goodell is teeing Snyder up to do the right thing while still saving face. But you can bet your bottom dollar that Goodell and his horsemen are working behind the curtain on a way to get Snyder to budge.

There is also talk that if RGIII, the face of the organization, speaks out about how he dislikes the name, that Snyder will HAVE to change the name.

The thing is, none of these scenarios need to happen to push for a name change because Snyder, the one man in control, is going to do it anyway.

Let me explain.

No one needs to have Native American heritage to argue as to why the term “Redskins” is offensive and why it shouldn’t be a team name. Because even if one ignores the fact that the name cannot hide behind the idea that it is “honoring” a tribe, or that the term is a racial epithet; they still cannot argue against this: What would you say if there was a team called “The New York Black Boys.” Well, actually there was (sort of) a team like that in the negro leagues of baseball. On a given night, one could see The New York Black Yankees take on the Chicago Brown Bombers. Yeah, that was baseball in the ’40s.

While we are delving into history I would like to quickly point out that the Redskins were also the last team to integrate in the NFL. Then-owner George Preston Marshall had an all-white team for years and only integrated to get the Kennedy brothers off his back and a moving truck to a better stadium. Also known as: To make more money.

And that, my friends is where Dan Snyder comes in.

Snyder is a wealthy man, and pretty smart about his business. Do you ever think about why teams change their uniforms and logos so often? Why, after only three years with a particular jersey style, did the Vikings change their uniforms? For money, of course. New logos means new merchandise and more rabid fans purchasing new hats, sox and underwear.

ESPN’s Darren Rovell noted in an article that a new NFL team in Los Angeles would make nearly $200 million in merchandise sales alone. Let’s move that team out of L.A. and into a smaller market but add in an already established fan base and conservatively say that the name change could bring Snyder about $100 million. All for switching out “Redskins” for “Warheads” (They are in DC…). Snyder would be stupid not to do it, and as Keith Olbermann poignantly stated, Snyder could really make out in the deal if he attained merchandising rights similar to that of Jerry Jones, who shares less of his team’s merchandising profits than any other owner.

That’s nothing compared to the fans and positive PR Snyder would get for being “that guy who converted from ignorant owner to humble savior.” Everyone loves it when a team gets a new look, until they realize it’s the Jaguars and turn the channel. But not in Washington, where they have a franchise quarterback who, ironically, represents the class of quarterbacks that, throughout generations, have been told they cannot win a Super Bowl, throw the football or get tattoos (because that might “ruin the team image”). Washington has a quarterback who represents the Donovan McNabb’s that Rush Limbaugh thought got a pass by the media because they were black. The Redskins have a transcendent quarterback named Robert Griffin III who fights against all stereotypes, and he would not have even been invited inside the team building 55 years ago.

But that all changed, and Washington was better for it.

So, what’s in a name?

The ‘#1 Overall’ NBA Draft Curse And The #1 Way to Fix It

In the 2013 NBA draft, the Cleveland Cavaliers selected Anthony Bennett from UNLV. It was their third time picking first since 2003 (the other two being LeBron James and Kyrie Irving). Besides the obvious fact that picking first means you probably do not have a good team, I’m here to tell you that having the ping pong ball bounce in your favor in the NBA draft is really THE worst luck of all.

Okay, let’s start with a little lottery history. Back in 1984, the Houston Rockets won the right to draft number one overall by means of a coin flip. They, allegedly, tanked the previous season in order to get some guy named Akeem Olajuwon (hint: they got him). The NBA did not like the idea of teams tanking for a better draft position, so they adopted a lottery system. From 1985-1989, the “early lottery system” was introduced. Here, the lottery picks were chosen by envelope inside a hopper. Every non-playoff team had the same chance of getting a top pick, until the NBA modified the process slightly by only picking the top 3 picks, and aligning the rest by win-loss record. So, if your team had the worst record, and missed out on the top 3, you were guaranteed fourth. Then, in 1990, the NBA introduced the “weighted lottery system.” This is our modern process, where the team with the worst record has the highest percentage of getting the number one overall pick (roughly 25%).

Now, for some, landing the number one overall pick is the ticket out of the dump and a step towards greatness. But if we look deeper, we notice a startling trend brewing from that number one overall spot.

From 1985, the first year of the NBA lottery, through 2012, only two #1 overall picks have won NBA titles with the team that has drafted them. David Robinson and Tim Duncan. That’s two-for-twenty-seven, or a success rate of 7%. In theory, a team who drafts low should move towards the top of the draft pecking order, considering they drafted more highly skilled players. I’m not naive enough to say that this should be totally cyclical, but if we look at guys who have led their draft-day teams to the Finals, we only add 6 players to the list (and that’s counting Kenyon Martin, who was second fiddle to Jason Kidd on the Nets).

Now, let’s look at the two guys who won NBA titles with their draft-day teams. The San Antonio Spurs were a good team throughout the middle ’90s, with David Robinson leading them to a couple playoff trips plus Robinson’s MVP and scoring title to boot. But a season-ending injury to Robinson put the 1996-97 season into a downward spiral. The Spurs had the third-worst record and landed the #1 overall pick, and the surest thing since Robinson himself. Thy name was Timothy Duncan. This circumstance needs to be taken with a grain of salt, for anyone could have predicted that a Duncan and Robinson team-up would equal championships. It would be like the Cavs drafting Kyrie Irving after LeBron left, but then having LeBron COME BACK after a lone year in Miami.

So what does this all mean? It means that the ever-present myth in the NBA is just that: a myth. We all know the story, “One dominant player equals NBA titles.” Maybe we have heard it in words similar to, “Look at MJ. Look at Kobe. Even Dirk did it all by himself.” These are all lies. One player, alone, does not bring a team a title. Jordan had Pippen, Kerr, Rodman. Kobe had Shaq (or Shaq had Kobe..) and Gasol and Bynum. Even Dirk had great help from Tyson Chandler, J.J. Barea and Jason Terry. But the secret in all of this, the hidden gem that leads to REAL success in the NBA, lies in those off the court.

If you want to win in the NBA, hire a great coach, AND keep them around. The real reason these teams at the bottom stay at the bottom is because they rotate through coaches faster than Taylor Swift does through boyfriends. I mean seriously, the Charlotte Bobcats have had six different head coaches in their nine year history, and have made the playoffs only once (with Hall Of Famer Larry Brown as head coach. More on him in a bit). Granted, they have not drafted #1 overall yet, but the L.A. Clippers have. The Clips have had seven head coaches in the last 13 years, that’s a shelf life of about 1 and three-quarters of a season. The Magic have a similar revolving door of  six coaches in 14 years. On the contrary, majority of the teams that have won NBA titles in the last 20 years had stability with their coaching staff. Phil Jackson coached the Bulls (nine years) and Lakers (eleven) for a total of 20 years and has 11 rings. Pat Riley has been with the Heat since 1995 and Erik Spoelstra joined the team as an assistant back in 1997, they have three titles. Gregg Popovich has head coached the Spurs for a remarkable 17 years and has four rings. Even Doc Rivers spent four years with the Celtics before hoisting the NBA title. The only team that had a “revolving door” coaching staff was the Detroit Pistons in 2004. Head coach Larry Brown came in and left in true Larry Brown fashion. Even his first NBA title couldn’t keep Larry Brown in town for long.

So there you have it, the real formula to winning in the NBA: Consistency in coaching. Does it help to have LeBron, or Kobe, or MJ? Hell yes, but not as much as having a legitimate voice barking out defensive schemes.

If we want to truly test out this hypothesis, the current Cavilers roster is home to two #1 overall draft picks of the Cleveland franchise, Mr. Kyrie Irving and Sir Anthony Bennett (not sure if he is a Sir…yet). Now we can debate Bennett’s legitimacy as a potential star as well as Cleveland’s inept ownership (Comic Sans and “Hickson-for-Casspi” to name a few). But will these two debunk the myth of player star power, or prove it to be true? Oh but wait, you know the other thing the Cavaliers have now? A coach that has been with them for six out of the last nine years, Mike Brown.

Cleveland Cavaliers. NBA champions. 2015. Maybe LeBron SHOULD go back to Cleveland…

Casting Call: The Avengers 2

Quicksilver. Scarlet Witch. Both have been confirmed by Joss Whedon as part of the new additions to The Avengers 2. Rumors are swirling that Hank Pym a.k.a. Ant-Man will also be in the blockbuster sequel. But as of now, we’re only going to look at the brother-sister combo of Pietro and Wanda.

Before we begin, let me mention a few things.

As of now (and for the foreseeable future) Marvel Studios cannot use any characters featured in 20th Century Fox’s “X-Men” movies as well as the term “mutant.” That puts Wanda and Pietro in a bit of a kerfuffle, because they are…how do it put it…the mutant children of Magneto!

That’s two-for-two on “things we cannot mention,” but the tricky part is that Wanda and Pietro have spent time as members of the Avengers. So they, like Namor, are in a sort of a “movie rights limbo” right now, being both mutant and Avenger. It will also be interesting to see if they are good or bad, considering they flip flop more than a fish on a boat.

But yeah, movie rights are weird, and hopefully one day Marvel can get Spidey and the X-Men back. But that is about as likely as Disney getting the rights to Star Wars…Oh wait! There is a…new hope now!

Anyways, the following is a short bio on the character followed by possible actors/actresses who could play the role of the REAL wonder twins.

Quicksilver

Super speed and slick white hair, Pietro Maximoff lives life fast. He has been a hero, a villain and a lost cause. Quicksilver is close to his sister (sometimes too close), and has done great and horrible things in her name. Whether it is assassinating Cyclops, or assisting in saving the Avengers, Quicksilver gets around. He has died, been reborn (but who hasn’t…) and traveled at Mach 10 speeds. A complex character who can be sly, manipulative and quick-witted, Pietro Maximoff will be a tough cast.

Ben Foster

Foster has already played a mutant before, as Warren Worthington (Angel) in X-Men 3: The Last Stand. He was also in the first Punisher movie, as a pierced up goof ball. Why not add a third Marvel film? Speaking of which, Chris Evans swapped Human Torch (side note: The Human Torch is rumored to be African American in the Fantastic four reboot. Another topic for another post) for Captain America, why can’t Foster make the jump? He is a solid actor, showing his range in The Messenger and putting up a sneaky good performance in Alpha Dog. He is a thin and slick-looking guy that has the “I’m angry and confused” look down pat, perfect for Pietro.

Emile Hirsch

Another actor who has good skills, Hirsch has done it all. Action flick with Speed Racer (Which I have not seen. But I have heard it is not as bad as everyone says), drama/adventure with Into the Wild and the wonderfully funny The Girl Next Door. This could be Hirsch’s coming out party, a la Mark Ruffalo in Phase 1.

Anton Yelchin

This Russian actor is becoming the “that gut from…” type of actor and might fit into Marvel’s affordable actor range for A2. He is a good actor, don’t get me wrong, having done a solid job in Star Trek and Terminator: Salvation. He was also Charlie Bartlett in the eponymous titled movie alongside Robert Downey, Jr. There’s his “in” to A2! However, Yelchin still has a boyish look about him, and might look a bit too young compared to his on screen buddies. His best chance is if the studio DOES look to cut the casting budget and wants the Russian sounding Pietro Maximoff to be Russian.

Ryan Reynolds

Yeah, Reynolds seems to be in a lot of “superhero casting” wants. He has played Deadpool and Green Lantern and has made it on to another wish-list of this blog. But no one can deny Reynolds has the speedy talk down that would fit Pietro, as well as the strong-yet-not-bulky-like-The-Rock body type. He could be too expensive for Marvel, but who would turn down the chance to be part of a super-team up of heroes in a mega blockbuster (I’m looking at you Ed Norton).

Scarlet Witch

Wanda Maximoff is a crazy woman. She is a pretty powerfuly lady, having eradicated 98% of mutants by uttering three words, “No. More. Mutants.” She can be rebellious, and her powers are categorized as “probability hexes.” She can tilt the odds in her favor, and can sometimes warp reality itself (see: the whole no more mutants thing). She is pretty wacky and has major mental issues, seeing that she affects everything around her by just thinking about something. Makes life pretty rough if you get angry and think “I wish you weren’t born” and then that person disappears. Remind me to never get on her bad side.

Noomi Rapace

This Swedish sweetie (lame…) is a darn good actress. She is that chick in Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows (RDJ connection!) and the leading lady in Prometheus. She was also Lizbeth Salander in the European The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. She has the looks for Wanda, and plays crazy pretty well. A friend of mine put Rapace in my head, and I cannot seem to think of a better pick. She should be affordable, and would bring the skills needed for the depth and complexity of Wanda.

Olivia Wilde

The beautiful Olivia Wilde has experience with action/sci-fi in Tron: Legacy. She has an exotic look to her, and is a brunette to boot. Unfortunately, Tron may be what keeps her out. They are working on getting a sequel going for Tron, and it might just be shooting at the same time as A2.

Kat Dennings

Okay, so she was in Thor and is most known for her comedic timing. But Dennings seems like a solid fit for Wanda, an actress just waiting to show her psycho side. A man can dream…

Aubrey Plaza

Another gal who is most known for her comedy, the new “Indie-movie chick” could play Wanda well if Marvel is looking to add some dead-pan comedy to her character. Either way, her comedic counterpart (Chris Pratt) from Parks and Rec got a deal to be in The Guardians of the Galaxy so I don’t think it is too much of a stretch for Plaza. She is an actress that would probably be best fit for Raven from DC, sarcastic and sad, yet dark and powerful, but she could being a new spin to Wanda the Witch.

Scarlett Johansson 

Okay, stay with me here. She is already Black Widow, I know. But I am going to run a “Mandarin” cinematic twist by you. So Black Widow is a mysterious lady who has a lot of “red in her ledger.” So maybe the red involves some Scarlet Witch-y type issues. We have discussed the issue with Marvel trying to keep the actor budget low, and some fans don’t care for Black Widow (personally, I think she is a badass). Now, she has a bigger role in Captain America 2 but that doesn’t mean there can’t be a twist in A2. Merging the Scarlet Witch with the Black Widow would cut costs, add an interesting element to the characters’ backgrounds (Maximoff and Rominoff are both Russian last names…) and work around the whole “mutant” labeling issue. Make the story heavily involve Black Widow, as well delve into her past with the emergence of her brother, and you can give females the movie hero they have been waiting for. They altered The Mandarin, and the twist added to the story, hopefully they can do the same thing with The Scarlet Witch. The likelihood of this happening is .00001%, but I think Johansson would have been a perfect fit for Wonder Twin of Chaos.

That’s it. The definitive list of who should play the (don’t say mutant) powered siblings of the Marvel Universe. No matter who plays them, I think we all can agree, the movie is going to be awesome.

SPOILER FREE: An Abstract Review of “Iron Man 3”

Yup. I saw it early. In 3-D (with a special thanks to a friend of mine). I feel pretty lucky and I want to share my thoughts with the world.

And hey, isn’t that what a blog is for?

Now, there will be no spoilers here, even though knowledge of how a story is going to end should not deter one from seeing such a movie.

But I digress.

First off, Iron Man 3 is a spectacular film. The visual and special effects departments for this movie spared no expense, because every suit and every other detail (I gotta keep it vague, but you’ll know what I mean when you see it) in this movie look amazing. In one scene, we get to see the galaxy, followed by the electromagnetic spectrum of the brain (I think that’s what it is…) and it was truly breathtaking, especially in 3-D.

I’m not a huge 3-D guy, but I have to be honest, the movies that I have seen in 3-D as of late (The Hobbit and Iron Man 3) have been really impressive. The usual eye sores and 3-D gimmickry were nowhere to be found and I may be slowly “post-production-converting” myself to 3-D (bad 3-D pun…).

Now, in Iron Man 3 we learn of some of Tony’s past mistakes. I liked the pre-Ironed Tony we got to see and if you pay attention, you’ll notice a cameo of a character that links to a scene from Iron Man. This film has probably the best humor of the three Iron Man flicks, and is definitely the darkest.

Iron Man 3 has the usual Robert Downey humor we are all used to, but it has it in the most awkward of spots, which just adds to the hilarity. The movie was directed by Shane Black, who is best known for the Lethal Weapon franchise and Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang. Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang is probably my favorite comedy, it starred none other than Robert Downey, Jr. and had the type of awkward humor that Tony Stark has in his third solo film. Iron Man 3 also borrows the RDJ narration that Kiss Kiss had, as well as the twists. The twist in Iron Man 3 is pretty good from a cinematic perspective (and the studio did a great job of hiding it), but to be honest, I had a huge issue with the twist. I want to be vague, but I will say this: If you read the comics, you might have the urge to walk out (it is that frustrating!) and if you don’t read the comics, you won’t care.

As the movie progressed, I slowly realized that Iron Man 3 was turning slightly into The Dark Knight Rises. Again, I’ll keep it vague, but certain elements from DKR are highly prevalent in this movie, pretty much from minute 20 to the end credits. Iron Man 3 does not feel as long as DKR, but it does borrow some of the plot themes Nolan used for the Bats.

Overall, I would give Iron Man 3 a 4/5 and might have it tied with Iron Man for the best in the series. The humor and story are solid, and the effects are beyond comparison. Surprisingly, if not for the twist, I might have this at a 5/5.

Well, I’ll be seeing it two more times in the next two days, so maybe my viewpoint will change.

ILL-Kahnceived

Well, David Kahn is out as President of Basketball Operations for the Minnesota Timberwolves. The move comes as no surprise, for Kahn was sitting in hot water since the beginning of last summer. For some Kahn was a man with no plan, a guy who needed to go. Fast.

But now that he is gone, I think we need to take an honest look at the good and the bad that was David Kahn.

The Good

Ricky Rubio-For what it’s worth, David Kahn stuck to his guns with the Spanish sensation, refusing trade offers from New York among other teams, and eventually got his man to Minny. Rubio, who allegedly did not want to play for Minnesota, has been an impact point guard in the NBA and looks to be the star everyone thought he’d be. You have to give Kahn props for that.

Avoiding DeMarcus Cousins-I will acknowledge that DeMarcus Cousins has the talent to easily be the second or third best center in the NBA, but the dude has the maturity level of a second grader. Do I know the guy? No. On a certain level, I don’t like judging a guy’s character when I don’t know them, but when one looks at the on-court whining and off-court issues (he got a coach fired) he has had, one has to wonder, “what is it with this guy?” Well, he is only 22 years old and was in the league at 19, so yeah, he was a kid. Exactly why he wouldn’t work on a Wolves team that had a terrible head coach named Kurt Rambis and a team that was pretty dysfunctional. No leadership, which is what a young man needs, and Cousins would have exploded like he has in Sacramento. Cousins will grow and mature, but it will definitely not be with the team that drafted him. Plus, We had a guy named Nikola Pekovic sitting in our back pocket. If we had a good center, Pek may not have developed into what he has become now.

Amnestying Darko- Need I say more. (I must, but it is not in this category).

The 2012 off-season- This past summer, the Timberpuppies did not have a first round draft pick, courtesy of the “Sam Cassell for Marko Jaric” trade back in 2005. Despite that, Kahn still managed to get some decent players for the future of the Wolves.  Looking at Chase Budinger and Dante Cunningham, we find two youthful guys that can be solid bench players (although I believe the Red Dragon can/will be a quality starter for the Wolves next year). Kahn also went out and got Greg Stiemsma, a guy who can block a few shots, on the cheap. Then there was Brandon Roy, who was signed to basically a one-year deal that was based on the health of his knees. That didn’t pan out, but it was salary cap space that wasn’t getting used anyway. Now, one of the best moves Kahn made last year was grabbing Andrei Kirilenko. AK-47 had his best year shooting, and had a solid comeback to the NBA, wining international player of the year honors.

The Bad

the 2009 NBA draft or Jonny Flynn- David Kahn’s tenure started back in 2009, and boy did he come out running. That year, the Timberwolves held four first round picks, two of which were in the top 10. Kahn selected Jonny Flynn, Ricky Rubio, Ty Lawson and Wayne Ellington. I can’t really hate on the Ty Lawson trade to Denver, because allegedly the trade was worked out pre-draft and Denver wanted Lawson. So on paper, it looks bad, but these types of pre-draft day trades happen all the time (see: OJ Mayo for Kevin Love).  I will be honest though, that year I wanted the Wolves to draft a combination of Flynn/Curry or Rubio/Curry (in that order). Looking at the draft, you had two true point guards in Flynn and Rubio, and two guys who could possibly play and score off the ball in Curry and Jennings. I don’t think anyone knows why the hell Kahn drafted the two true points, maybe he didn’t think Rubio would fall to him after he picked Flynn. Oh wait, Wolves had picks 5 AND 6. But in all seriousness, Kahn said that these two could play together, which is total bologna. I think that behind the scenes, Kahn and company weren’t sure if Rubio was ever going to come to the NBA to play for Minnesota, so they covered their asses. Or maybe Kahn misspelled “Curry” and David Stern just assumed he wrote “Flynn.” So yeah, we all know what happened in the years to come…

Darko Milicic- Oh, Darko. Forever the guy burdened with the curse of “After LeBron, but before ‘Melo.” Poor Darko. He never got a solid chance in the NBA after being mentally broken down by coach Larry Brown while with Detroit. But yet, Darko got a nice paycheck from Kahn for 4 years and $20 million. Darko was the kind of player that either got going early in a game and stayed hot for 48 minutes, or missed his first lay-up and then forgot how to rebound. Darko, Darko, Darko. He could block a shot or two, but mostly he spent his time out of position on defense and losing the ball on offense. Plus, Kahn actually compared Darko’s passing ability to that of Vlade Divac’s. Darko had great handles with the ball, but never showed that ability to be consistent at the NBA level. Darko now serves in the Serbian military and sends diseased people to China to get treatment for their illness. You can’t make this stuff up. Trust me, I’ve tried.

Kevin Love- No, no, no. I don’t mean to suggest that K-Love is a bad thing, only Kahn’s handling of the team’s superstar. The Wolves have been put into a difficult spot, with three guys that, because of the market, will be worth max deals. Kahn decided to not lock down the best of the three in Kevin Love. Instead, he kind of insulted Love (which Love needs to get over) and created tension when there needn’t be any. Kahn and company did not think Love was a cornerstone for the team. Really? The guy had Jonny Flynn and Darko! That was what angered me the most, because whether Love can play defense or not, no one can guard him on the offensive end. Kevin Love is a sharpshooter who can rebound like no other, and continues to add to his game. The Wolves needed to lock him down, and Kahn dropped the ball. Hopefully Love doesn’t bolt within the next three years.

-Side Note: New (rumored) GM Flip Saunders will do one of two things: 1. Trade K-Love this off-season ASAP. 2. If that does not happen, I think Love stays for a long time and that Flip Saunders will be the key to Kevin Love staying in Minnesota, partly because he is Flip Saunders, but mostly because he isn’t David Kahn.

Wesley Johnson- I already went over why I think DeMarcus Cousins was a good idea to avoid, but I will now list off the names of guys drafted after Wesley Johsnon. Greg Monroe, Paul George, Pat Patterson, Larry Sanders, Eric Bledsoe. What the Hell? I rescind my idea that Kahn might have accidentally picked Jonny Flynn, because apparently he loves Syracuse. The big blunder on that list is Paul George. George played the same position as Johnson, was just as freakish of an athlete as Johnson was supposed to be, but he was three years younger. I’ll just let Arrested Development finish this thought for me and summarize David Kahn’s tenure in Minnesota.

The Wolves have not been to the playoff in nine seasons, and Arrested Development has been off the air for seven years. Hopefully A.D. is not the only one that makes a comeback in 2013.

Thor 2-Loki’s World

So I found this picture on the internet…

…and I liked it.

So I tried my own version (click on it for a better look). Let me know what you think.

Thoughts From The Man of Steel Trailer (And Other Hopes and Dreams)

Wow. WOW. Holy mother of Jor-El was that trailer awesome. I cannot wait for June 14th.

But before that, let’s look at what we learned and what to expect in this summer blockbuster.

Let’s start with the opening in the trailer, where we hear the first bits of Hans Zimmer’s score, which sounds amazing. I really loved it, and even though it won’t be in the same category of John Williams’s score from the original, I still think it’s going to be spectacular. As for the visuals, we see some beautiful shots of Krypton in shambles amidst a massive war, under a yellow-ish sun. A few things to note here: Number one is that Krypton is supposed to die because of an unstable core that blows up, not because of a war. There are some different twists to Krypton’s demise, some include their red sun blowing up, some include Brainiac, but mostly it surrounds the whole dying planet bit. I’m OK if they make Krypton enter into a war, just as long as they don’t kill themselves. The demise should still be focused around the planet blowing itself up, not the people.

Number two is the yellow sun. I might be a bit nit-picky here, but that sun looked awfully yellow. It cannot be yellow. The whole point that Superman gets his powers from our yellow sun is due to the fact that his sun was red, and not yellow. Otherwise Krypton would have had millions of god-like powered people flying around. They didn’t.

Moving on, I want to say that it seems as though WB made all the right casting decisions. Honestly, I think Kevin Costner and Russell Crowe as the father figures in this movie are a perfect fit. Crowe has an ability to make everything feel epic and honest (see: Gladiator) while Costner plays the cornfield American better than anyone (see: Field of Dreams). Those two, alongside Michael Shannon (who will be the Tom Hiddleston-esque breakout of this film), Diane Lane, Amy Adams AND Laurence Fishbourne will help give this movie the depth and seriousness it deserves.

While on the subject of Laurence Fishbourne, some people have had an issue with Perry White being cast as a black man. To me, it really doesn’t matter, we color bend roles in every other movie (Nick Fury IS supposed to be white you know… except in the Ultimate Universe. Long story. Maybe in another post…) and life moves on. For some movies, race does matter, like in The Last Airbender, where certain tribes are supposed to look similar. They are not supposed to have two white folk in the middle of a bunch of Inuits (M. Night WHYYYY!?). Also, allegedly they made Jimmy Olsen’s character a girl in Man of Steel too. So there, now they color bended and gender bended two supporting roles (although I hope her name is not still Jimmy…). What are you going to do about it? Nothing, because it doesn’t matter. Maybe Zack Snyder just wanted to troll all those idiots out there. Awesome. I wish he made Lois Lane a blonde.

Before I go on, please watch this creepy announcement from our friend General Z (found below).

Ok, so General Zod is going to be a badass. I love this sort of viral marketing, where it has the audience of a film feel like they are part of the movie itself. The Dark Knight did it with way more depth, having fans join in with some of the Joker’s shenanigans to reveal a picture of himself. This is just really simple stuff studios can do to get on the good side of fans. A win-win if you ask me. Now back to the trailer, in which one could find said new trailer at the website iwillfindhim.com, and one would have been confused as for the name of said website. Until, that is, Zod screams (presumably) at Jor-El “I WILL FIND HIM!” late in the trailer.

And yes, you will find him, General Zod. I can’t wait.

Now, we are all familiar with the fact that Christopher Nolan’s and David S. Goyer’s scripts for The Dark Knight Trilogy were heavily influenced from the stories Long Halloween,Batman: Year One, along with some dashes of Dark Knight Returns and Knightfall.

Well, I believe that for Man Of Steel we are going to see influences from Superman: Earth One and All-Star Superman. That great line that Jor-El says late in this trailer (and in the teaser), “You will give the people of Earth an ideal to strive towards…In time, they will join you in the sun” is nearly word for word from the lines of All-Star Superman. And I love it. I love taking elements and bite size pieces from comic material and transposing them onto the big stage. I think it is a bit odd that we clamor to have exact stories transferred from book to screen when we talk about franchises like Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter or Hunger Games, and we never imagine taking those characters and telling a unique and original story with them on film. Yet we look at superheroes and never see a story go from graphic novel to live action movie. I think it has more to do with the way comics are told (almost always on-going) versus novels (which have a definite beginning, middle, and end).

But I digress.

Now, in the trailer we see Clark lost “among the people.” In the beginning, we hear some dumb-ass mom calling out Clark as a freak. “My son was on the bus,” she says with a hint of anxiety. Oh yeah? Well without Clark, YOUR SON WOULD BE DEAD IN THAT RIVER AND WE WOULD BE PREPARING FOR HIS FUNERAL! Seriously, some people…

But yeah, people are scared of Clark. And why wouldn’t they be? HE LIFTED A GODDAMN BUS. People would be jealous, scared, happy, and worried. I love that even Clark is scared, saying to Pa, “Can’t I just keep pretending I’m your son?”

“You are my son.”

Love. It.

He seems to be finding himself, and the tone here could mimic that found in Earth One, where Clark is unsure of what to do with himself, and tries out a bunch of careers (including top scientist/starting NFL quarterback) before settling in at the Daily Planet.

Then we have the suit. The overly-textured suit that Clark dons in this movie looks great, and I’ve heard that the cape is 100% CGI. I have mixed feelings about the CGI cape, because Ryan Reynold’s suit in Green Lantern was CGI and…exactly. But, Zack Snyder is great with effects, and the reasoning behind the CGI cape is to allow more natural movement from actor Henry Cavill, and to make the cape look sweet in the right shots. I’ll buy it, because in the trailer, the cape plays.

I also liked how they seem to be tying Superman’s suit to his Kryptonian origins, as hinted at near the end of the trailer, when Supes and Lois are having a cute discussion while Clark is “being held” by authorities.

“It’s not an S. On my world, it means hope.”

“Well here…It’s an ‘S.'”

“Well I don’t give a f***, I have X-ray vision and I notice you like the color black.” [Cue Superman to wink and bust out of chains followed by the murder of Zod.]

I hope that’s how it goes in the director’s cut…

Another thing that looks great from the trailer are the fight scenes. We see millisecond cuts of battles that look to be greater than any Superman film in the past. The cuts look to feature a busted oil rig on fire and a showdown with a huge tentacle being. Supes also is seen exchanging punches with Zod that knock him back miles. Thankfully there are no battles where Superman and Lex Luthor are talking in an underground base that ends with Superman wearing a Kryptonite necklace. Lame.

Speaking of Lex Luthor, he is rumored to NOT be in this movie in any sort of way. That being said, I am willing to bet we see a shot of the LexCorp tower or a poster for “Lex Luthor for President” at some point in the film. Maybe no actual Lex, but his presence will be felt.  Then there is the shot of a man in an armored suit in the latest trailer, and for a split second it looks like it is shaded purple and green. The same color combo Lex uses.. Just saying that logically, Zod should not need an armored suit to fight Superman, because he gets the same boost from the yellow sun that Clark gets. Unless there is some sort of Kryptonite weapon that Zod has and he must shield himself from it. Personally, I think that would be dumb, because the whole “I’ll use Kryptonite to make Superman weak so I can beat his ass” villain routine is EXTREMELY worn out. Let’s have an old fashioned rumble between these super-gods and leave it at that.

Just please, no Kryptonite necklaces.